A former student
reached out to me a few weeks ago to ask for advice. He told me that he had
dropped his finance major and switched into the college of education to prepare
for a career teaching social studies. My heart, of course, swelled, and it had
me reminiscing on the events that led me to drop my pre-law focus and become a
high school teacher. Having a mother in education was a start, the fact that
all of my extra-curriculars were focused on mentoring, tutoring, or leadership
development was another factor, and Annie naturally, who constantly encouraged
me to ignore societal pressures and pursue what I really wanted to do. But even
with all of these factors, I kept coming back to one event - one conversation…
My career as I know it
today, many of the facets that I define myself by: a teacher, educator, mentor - may not have been possible without Tony
Kraus.
I'm writing this now
because 3 weeks ago Mr. Kraus lost his battle with lung cancer. I watched on
social media as his students, current and former, poured out their hearts
remembering his impacts at Owensboro Catholic High School. I knew I wouldn't be
able to get out how much this man impacted me in just a Facebook post, so
I wanted to take the time to sit down and really get my thoughts out. In
reflecting on the life and impacts of Tony Kraus, I came up with three key
lessons that he taught me. And I believe (you will soon read why) he would've
wanted me to share these with the world.
1.) Tell your story.
I am a teacher
because of one conversation I had with Mr. Kraus my senior year of high school.
With one conversation, he planted a seed that would later bloom into a calling.
With only one story he provided the light I needed to illuminate what I was meant
to do. But he didn't just tell me and the other students in the room a story,
he told us his story.
Mr. Kraus was not a
life-long teacher. In fact, he started his 13 year career at OCHS one year
before my freshman year - when he was 37. Like most students, I never
questioned this, as the life-experiences of my educators was the furthest thing
from my mind when I was 15 years old. But Mr. Kraus opened himself up to a
group of senior boys in 2008. He told us about how he had worked in the banking
industry for 10 years; he talked about his six figure salary, and what it was
like to be seen as so successful at such a young age. But he also told us about
the hole he felt in his heart - and the fateful conversation he had with a
group of friends that prompted him to quit his job, re-enroll in a teaching
program in his 30s, and go teach religion at a private school making 1/4 the
salary of his previous life. And he told us there was no greater decision
(outside of marrying his wife) he'd ever made.
In that simple act -
speaking his truth - he unconsciously lit a spark in me that left me thinking what if for years to come. In putting himself
out there he gave us all the unspoken permission to do the same. His life was a reminder to be your
authentic, vulnerable self - and take any chance you get to share that with
others - because you never know who needs to hear it.
2.) Live the life
you have imagined - but make sure it's you who's imagining it
Henry David Thoreau
wrote those words over 150 years ago - "Go
confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have
imagined." Tony Kraus showed me two things about that statement:
First, that you can always reinvent yourself. That you are not trapped in
whatever life you currently have. There is always a chance for you to go after
the life you've dreamed of.
Secondly, and
possibly more importantly, is that you can't always trust the you in the life you
have imagined.
Mr. Kraus lived the
first half of his life searching for what he had believed was the life: the money, the status, the job. He
achieved all of it through his own efforts, but he came to realize that the
life he imagined was actually a life that others had imagined for him. It's so
easy to get caught up in the cultural and societal definitions of success, to
define our own success by what others expect of us. We allow the demands of
life and society define our standards instead of crafting our own based on what
really matters. Which leads me to his third, and most critical lesson.
3.) We were put on
this earth to serve others
This is my third
takeaway, but ultimately it is the single most identifiable character trait of
Tony Kraus - servant. It was, to him, the true meaning of life. In everything he
did Mr. Kraus put himself last. Tirelessly dedicated to his students, his
family, and his community, Mr. Kraus was someone I could count on to exclaim 'Parker Whitehouse, how the heck are ya?!' ,
and really mean it. He was genuinely interested in the lives of his students.
Teaching for him was a natural extension of his desire to serve and a lesson
for all of us in how we define the purpose of our lives.
In his decision to teach, Tony Kraus teaches all of us that our lives are not
defined by our victories, successes, or achievements. That our purpose in life
is not self-gratification or -fulfillment. We are here to serve others. Mr.
Kraus revealed through his life the catch 22 of the happiness pursuit in which
American society has us trapped. We spend our lives seeking fulfillment and joy in
the world - looking for what the world can do for us - but never asking what we can
do for the world. The catch here is that we will never find happiness by seeking
it. We will never be satisfied looking for it. It
finds us only through our relationships and our service to others.
Though Tony Kraus
has moved on to a far greater place than this world, his impact on it will
continue to be felt as long as his lessons are still held by his students and
colleagues. Every student I've worked with is impacted by him. Every lesson I
teach happens in part because of him. I, and many others, will continue to pass
on those lessons he lived every day. He taught us to be bold by telling us his story. He showed all of us that in seeking
the life we dream of, we can be misled, but through faith and works we can
reinvent ourselves to the person we are meant to be. And ultimately he gave us
his greatest gift through the example of his life - purpose. We are here for a reason. We are here to serve.
With that in mind I cannot imagine a more
fitting end to his life than those words he most assuredly heard - 'Well done, oh good and faithful servant.'
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